Help! My 11-Year-Old Daughter Has Ruined One of My Oldest Friendships

“Q. My daughter’s new friends: I’ve been best friends with “Claudia” for most of my life. Until recently, our 11-year-old daughters “Maggie” (mine) and “Laura” (hers) were inseparable. This spring, Maggie began hanging out with a more “popular” group of kids; some of her new friends pick on Laura. The girls’ friendship was rocky over the summer, and now that school has resumed, Maggie all but shuns Laura. I have tried but am failing to like Maggie’s new friends—since she’s started spending time with them, she’s been in trouble for talking back to teachers and for joining in their bullying. My relationship with Claudia has become tense, and I don’t blame her. It’d be very painful to watch Laura treat Maggie the way Maggie has treated Laura. I’m so frustrated by Maggie’s new attitude. I find myself resenting her for the wedge that has been driven between Claudia and me. I love my daughter, but I don’t like her right now, and I don’t know how to welcome her new friends into my home when I know they’re bullies. Do you have any advice?”


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